Connecticut Courant, April 30, 1792
For the CONNECTICUT COURANT.
Messieurs PRINTERS,

SOMETIME ago I was reading the debates in Congress on the Mint Bill. It was proposed by the Senate (that aristocratic Junto) that the coins of the United States should, on one side, bear the figure of the President, with a view probably to do honor to the head of the Executive, and to render the coins of some historical use in ascertaining the chronology of political events at a future day. But I see the House of Representatives discovered a snake in the grass. The head of the President on coins! Why monarchy, aristocracy, and despotism would follow such a measure, as sure as a gun! Thanks to the shrewd microscopic minds of our southern brethren, we have escaped the snare-liberty stands her ground, and defies machination itself! Now if a Nero, a Caligula, or a Commodus: that is, an Adams, a Jefferson, or a Jay, or some such man that the people should elect, should hereafter be placed at the head of the Executive, and our Mint should be going at the same time, why we shall not have our pockets and purses secreting the heads of those monsters; we shall not be obliged to stare them full in the face every time we take an Eagle or a dollar from our pockets. Thanks to Congressional foresight, our freedom is yet safe and snug!

But, Messrs. Printers, what are we to have on the face of our coins? Why on one side Liberty, and on the other an Eagle. Liberty is a good device undoubtedly; but the Eagle, the Roman standard, the famous military Ensign, which, from the rank of the bird, among fowls, denotes sovereignty, and from its significance and use among the Romans, denotes conquest and despotism! This is indeed well placed on the reverse of liberty! They stand opposed to each other like two boxers at fisty cuffs. Like the Lion and the Unicorn in the British arms.

A piece of rhime I learnt when I was a boy, and which with little alteration, will well grace a corner of the National Gazette.I hope, in all conscience, this Roman Eagle may do no mischief; yet it makes the principal figure in the arms of the United States, and what is worse, it is the badge of distinction with the Cincinnati; that patriotic band of heroes, who, just before the Convention which gave birth to the present government, were forming schemes to give us a government of a kind well adapted to military men-I believe however it is all right. We ought to see no figures on coin which are disagreeable-no tyrants face should be stamped on the dear metals-for we should transfer our affection from the money to the man; from the man to his children-his measures-his principles-and then good bye, Liberty! Possibly once in an age the people might happen to choose for President a pretty good man, whose face on our dollars would not endanger liberty. In such case, it might be well to send addresses to him and praise him well-this is reward enough for the best man living; except our now President, whose fame and services will be preserved by an Equestrian Statue; but there will never be another such man; and so no occasion for more statues of Bronze. The chance is that nine tenths of our future Presidents will be clear devils-for when the Printer of the National Gazette is dead (an event very distant, I hope,) the patriotic people of the states will fall asleep. Indeed while this American Goose stands centinel over the "fiscal arrangements" of the treasury, I think the Secretary, with all his Gauls about him, will have good luck to surprise the castle of our liberties. But if cruel fate should take away our cackling centinel, and Gov. C-n, of New York should be left out of office, and S-l A-ms, B-n A-n, of Boston and their Printer should die or change their principles (of which however there is very little danger). I do not see but our state governments are gone, and with them life, liberty and everything else! However while there is life, there is hope-nil desperandum de republica.

Messrs. Printers, I see a committee of Congress have reported in favor of an Equestrian statue of our President-This I like-but the figure of the President on horseback is to be in Roman dress. What the toga? the purple of the Emperors? the robes of a Nero, a Caligula? It may be a good thing to borrow a dress from ancient Rome, as we have no dress of our own proper for the purpose; but Messrs. Printers, wont this dress endanger our liberties? I am an humble inquirer-I want information. Indeed on reflection, I think it is all right. There are in republican governments, which have equality for their basis, other great men besides Presidents-I am one of them; and if any man's face is impressed upon dollars, I think it should be mine; I have no idea of exclusive honors bestowed on men no better than myself. I think since we cannot all be partakers of this honor, to have our noses struck in gold and silver, and chinked in the pockets of posterity; we ought to vote against bestowing that honor on any man. I am no friend to distinctions! I am glad Congress thought of this in time to prevent it. Roman Eagles and Roman Robes can do no harm; for they have no competitors! Our Liberty is rare, Messrs. Printers.

PETER PUZZLE

[A Bibliography of the Writings of Noah Webster identifies Peter Puzzle as Noah Webster]

To read the complete book, see:
A bibliography of the writings of Noah Webster(https://archive.org/details/biwr00skee/page/n493/mode/2up?q=puzzle)